Google Assistant

First Impression

I got it because I was tired of getting up to turn off the bedroom light after I was already cozy in bed. My friend said I could just yell at my phone. Honestly, I thought it would be gimmicky and misunderstand me all the time. The first time I said “Hey Google, turn off the bedroom lights” from under the covers and it actually worked, I felt like a wizard. It was that simple, useful moment that made me keep it around instead of deleting it after a week.

What It Does Well

For the basic, boring stuff, it’s a champ. My hands are always full or dirty—like last Sunday when I was making pancakes and needed a timer. Just yelling “Hey Google, set a timer for five minutes” over the sizzle saved my breakfast from burning. It’s glued to my Google Calendar, so asking “what’s my day look like?” while I’m brushing my teeth in the morning gives me a quick rundown without touching my phone. Controlling my smart plugs and lights is still its best trick. Coming home with armfuls of groceries and saying “turn on the kitchen light” is a tiny victory every time. It’s also weirdly good for settling arguments. My roommate Sam and I were arguing about some actor’s age last Thursday, and a quick shout to Google settled it in seconds.

Where It Falls Short

It can be really, really dumb sometimes. You have to talk to it in a specific way. If I mumble “remind me to call Mom tomorrow,” it might set a reminder for “call Tom” and I’ll have no idea what that means. Asking it anything vague is a lost cause. “Play that song from the car commercial” gets me silence or a random track. And it definitely has favorite apps. It’ll pull up directions in Google Maps no problem, but trying to get it to message someone on anything but Google Messages can be a chore. Sometimes, in a quiet room, it’ll just activate for no reason, which is a little creepy.

Is It Worth the Price?

Well, it’s free, so that’s an easy yes. You’re not paying money for the app itself. The catch is that to really get the magic, you end up buying into other stuff. I bought a couple of smart plugs because of it. But just using it on my iPhone for timers, quick questions, and controlling my music? That costs nothing and saves me a bunch of little moments of hassle every day. For zero dollars, it’s a no-brainer.

Developer & Support

It’s Google, so it’s always changing. I don’t really notice updates, but every few months I’ll see a new little feature or it’ll handle a question slightly better. I’ve never had to contact support because nothing has ever broken badly enough. Looking at the App Store reviews, it seems like people either love it or have some very specific, angry problems with it. For my simple uses, it’s been solid and just keeps working in the background.

Privacy & Safety

This is the part that gives me pause. I know it’s listening for “Hey Google,” and I know Google is using my voice requests to… well, do whatever Google does. I went into the app settings once and saw a history of every weird thing I’ve ever asked it. You can delete that, which I do every now and then. It feels a bit like a trade-off. I get this convenience for free, and they get some data on my habits. I’m not planning a coup, so I’m mostly okay with it for now, but I get why it would freak some people out.